By Just A. Bartender
Dilworth, NC – Well, well….
Tiger Woods isn’t perfect, today he finally admitted to being a philanderer. As all the women in the media (and the righteous thinking main stream media) must gasp in indignation and show pictures of Tiger with his wife. Honestly, the guy cheated. A lot of us have, me included, while our wives are pregnant or just not putting out. It happens, he has apologized let’s let it go. We won’t, though. We will talk about it, we will joke about it, we will hear about how others have done the same — how Wilt Chamberlin slept with half of the women in the lower 48, even how Kobe Bryant is a rapist. The good news, now we don’t have to hear as much about the Alabama and Florida game this Saturday.
He did do the right thing, he didn’t hit back, when a woman is angry at you, you have three options:
(1) Hit her back and go to jail.
(2) Get his ass beat with a golf club.
(3) Run like hell.
At least he chose option three so he ends up with just a ticket, an angry wife, and a small spot on his record.
In this case let me go ahead and come down on the side of the athlete, the cheater, the bad guy, and the guy that really doesn’t know any better. Although his statement says so much different:
“I have let my family down and I regret those transgressions with all of my heart,” Woods said on his Web site. “I have not been true to my values and the behavior my family deserves. I am not without faults and I am far short of perfect. I am dealing with my behavior and personal failings behind closed doors with my family. Those feelings should be shared by us alone.”
The thing is millionaire athletes are raised and live in an entirely different environment than the average male. The women they marry, maybe even understand this better than they do. Juanita Jordan knew of Michael Jordan’s transgressions for years, only divorcing him when his finances started to dwindle (mainly from gambling). Athletes are brought up as womanizers and encouraged to continue to be as they go through their careers, only getting slapped down when the woman that has a handle on his money gets pissed and then chases him with a golf club. Before they are married, he cheats and cheats, and no one cares. His peers, coaches, and advisors all encourage the cheating kind of behavior.
It dates back to the high school locker room mentality: who can sleep with the most women, who can steal who’s girlfriend, who can get away with cheating on their girlfriend. This doesn’t change in college, where coaches entice recruits to school by having a group of good looking women take them around campus and then take them out to parties. So are we to believe this sort of behavior stops when guys turn pro? Hell no!
Having worked in the mainstream media for a long time, there was always honor amongst thieves between players, writers, and TV people. Actually it was encouraged. I can remember a coordinating producer congratulating me for cheating on my wife. Coaches and agents are the same as other players and writers, it is a mentality. Think about it, there are even women who do nothing but try to sleep with married athletes and reporters. We call them, pro-hos, they even exist at the minor league level. It is all kind of crazy to say this kind of behavior is fine, fine, fine, well until TMZ finds out about it. Give me a break.
As long as men have been men and women have been women, they have cheated. Human Beings are not monogamous creatures. I have seen it working in TV, working behind a bar, working on the road. Mainstream “nine to five” society honors the monogamy as something special, do they really believe in it, I doubt it. Is the mild-mannered secretary going to say ‘no’ if the rock star pulls them on stage on their one night out away from their boyfriend or their husband, HELL NO. We are not the penguins that re-find their mate every year to remain together. The key there is they only get together to mate, hey who doesn’t love a relationship designed on sex. Now take it one step further, big time athletes live in a crazy world, they are on the road in five star hotels, they have more money than God, and have gorgeous women throwing themselves at them. They slip and they slip a lot.
The bottom line is this, Tiger Woods cheated, so what! It is a culture created by the star status, created by the media, created by your high school coach. This will pass, but don’t frown, another blonde bimbo will bag a rich guy soon. The tabloids will print the story and it won’t suddenly stop Shaq from screwing Gilbert Arenas’ wife and Michael Jordan won’t stop hanging with the bimbos at the Sullivan’s on South Blvd in Charlotte. Right now as we make the Tiger jokes, there is some high school football player banging the head cheerleader in his sedan, even though they are both dating someone else. A producer is banging a PA or intern in some newsroom closet, and an NBA player is getting filacio in his hotel room after shoot around. The rules of the human race have been around for 6000 years, we still don’t follow them and never will. Give Tiger a break, he slept with a couple of gorgeous women while his wife wasn’t putting out. Most streets have two ways, he is dealing with enough, no need to pile on. At least for his sake his wife isn’t worth a shit at swinging a golf club.
and it’s Jimmy V week
At my age, my dream is to pickup the morning paper and see a headline that says, “Wayne Beissert Embroiled in Sex Scandal.” And my woman, a blond, ex-model is pissed. I’m living vicariously through Tiger. Go Tiger!